Index of all articles, click
here
By Sam zanahar (2010)
It's the women in the richest and most developed countries (North America, Europe, Japan) who do not want to have children, for two reasons: 1. because children are an enormous amount of work, and 2. because of the negative impact, pregnancy and childbirth have on their beauty.
By and large, girls and women in the above-cited developed parts of the world have fewer romantic notions about having children then the women in East Asia and Third World countries on other continents.
Yes, I am familiar with the powerful romantic idea of true lifelong love, with a omplete family, a husband (or, from my perspective: a wife), two children, a pet, a car, and an own home. Biology tricks you (a woman) and, to a somewhat lesser extend, me (a man) into finding such romantic ideas extremely appealing, because biology wants us to have children.
There are a few good reasons to have children, and there many reasons for not having children.
You do not have children for the sake of the children. You do not do them a favor by conceiving them. Your children, befoe they exist, couldn't care less about being born. And because life has a much greater potential for grief and sorrow than for pleasure and joy, it would be, from the perspective of your potential children, better you abstain from conceiving them.
You may want children because you expect a sense of fulfillment for yourself as a woman when having them. But this idea is overemphasised in the society you live in (if it is an Asian society, or the society in another Third World country). For 90 percent of the time, children are just work, and a burden.
Or should you have children because it will give you a hold over the man you love? Maybe you want to make sure that he will love you forever? And you assume that you can achieve this by giving him children.
But having children with a man will not give you more control over him. If you are afraid that he will leave you, or that he is just unfaithful, getting pregnant is not a suited strategy to win him back, or to even just bind him to you.
To the contrary! The following is certain: from the moment you get pregnant, your body sends all the wrong signals. Your beautiful small nipples enlarge, wrinkle, and become black (no cosmetic surgery can revert this); your face starts swelling, and later, of course, your belly.
It's probably even in a man's genetic make-up that after you have become pregnant, his mind wanders to other women. Because, from the perspective of a man's genes, once you are pregnant, you are a settled case. Time to look out for another female body that can be injected with his heritance-carrying material.
It has happened that when a girlfriend really angered me (or made me genuinely jealous, I wanted to impregnate her... as a means of revenge.
And indeed, to make a woman pregnant, or to have her bear one's child, is a terribly effective revenge.
With a single stroke, by having her bearing his child, a man totally colonizes a woman.
He suppresses her sexual market value. Now that she is pregnant, her chances of finding another man are heavily reduced. For at least a year, and maybe even for two or three, she is totally off the market.
And if she is at home in East Asia, not only is she off the market for a few years. Her long-term sexual market value also is heavily reduced. Unlike in Europe, where it makes little difference for the sexual market value of women whether they have given birth to children or not, the sexual market value of women who have given birth takes a deep dive in East Asia.
The reason why pregnancy and childbirth reduces the sexual market value of European women only slightly, while it makes a big difference for women in East Asia, may lie in the fact that pregnancy and childbirth have much less impact on the beauty of European women than that of Asian women.
If a man were to compare Europen identical twin sisters, one having given birth to a child, and one not, at the age of 35, they would see little difference. But if the twin sisters were East Asian, the difference would be substantial. The body and the genitals of the 35-year-old East Asian woman who has never given birth may still look like that of a teenager.
In East Asia, the sexual market value of the twin sister that has never given birth is much higher than that of the one who already is a mother because Asian men are aware of the great difference, childbirth makes for the beauty of women. In Europe, the sexual market value of the two is almost the same because European men are used to female bodies looking almost the same, regardless of whether the woman has given birth to a child or not.
I think that if you are an East Asian or Southeast Asian girl or woman, and if you want to become a mother, you should have a sound practical reason for it, apart from experiencing the emotional appeal (the romantic idea of a lifelong love and your own happy family). If bearing a foreigner's child affords you a lifelong residence permit in a Western European country, and if that is what you want, then you have a sound practical reason.
I mentioned in the first instalment of this article that I am open to the idea of having a child with an attractive woman whose primary interest it is to migrate to Germany. Anyway, I can easily afford it, and I guess when I'm old, having successful children, or a least one, could be something I derive some joy from.
So, if you are an attractive woman in a Third World counrty, and interested in becoming a legal lifelong resident in Germany, and if, furthermore, you want to bring your family to Germany, too, take me up on the offer, I made in the previous article (You think you want children).
But how, if, after reading the above article, you doubt whether you really want children? Does that mean that you have no purpose to contact me? Of course not. Making children anyway is not my primary concern for being together with an atractive woman.
My primary concern in any relationship with a woman is the extreme emotional reward I derive from love and sex. And mind you: I mean love and sex, not just sex.
So, if you have been thinking about contacting me, just go ahead, regardless of whether you want to conceive a child or not.
For my email address, see the page header. (lo*r)
Index of articles, click here.
Copyright Sam Zanahar